"I care"

I have said this past weekend that my "I care" button has been broken.  It seems that there is nothing I can do for myself that will cause me to actually WANT to do something for anyone what so ever.  I'm burnt out on caring.  It's a fact.  I want to walk around flicking people in the ear, or in the back of the head and tell them what's wrong with them.  I don't, because well, that would be REALLY bad, but I sure as heck don't wanna give a crap about someone  I don't like very much.  (no, not my husband-but a couple of my kids maybe...or, well, I'll leave some imagination for you guys.)
Anywho, I really have had a hard weekend at work, actually this whole past week was horrible.  State showed up this week to do their yearly survey.  They walk around, make sure everything is a kosher dill pickle, and all that jazz.  Well, we got one tag, just like last year we only got one tag.  Thankfully it wasn't the SAME tag.  Last year it was dining, this year it was call lights.  So, on top of that stressfull situation, our lead CNA was out on vacation, along with our unit manager, and one of our regular girls.  So, as back-up lead CNA, I got to play leader while state was in the building.  So, I got to do my assignment (which has some very flickable people on it-but I would NEVER. EVER.) make sure all the paperwork was up to date, and make sure all my own paperwork was completed, then run around behind everyone else and make sure THEIR paperwork was completed.  It was too much.  I'm burnt out.  I need a vacation from this past week.  I need a $5/hour raise just because of last week alone.  There were some problems end of the week (I told you I don't really flick people) that I thought I would have to stick up for a resident (even though they were in the wrong) because she fully has her mind and knew the consequences of her actions.  I can not force someone who is there own person to do the right thing, even if they are wrong.  Not my job. 

anyway....sorry....moving on...

Today is Sunday, and we are broke.  I have less than a half tank of gas, a tire with a nail in it, and no cat food.  We have just enough money in the bank to cover the auto payment for the a/c that is coming out at the end of the week.  PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let Friday get here before we go negative in the bank.  We have not been negative in the bank for a long time.  We do have a pretty strick budget that we pretty well keep to, but there are a few times a year we look and think, wow...did we party last night?  Cause if we are that low, I wanna at least think that I've had fun blowing it all.  Sheesh.  Being a grown-up is hard work, like, REALLY hard work.

I should totally be in bed.  It's 15 minutes past my bedtime.  But at least I can say that our lead CNA will be back tomorrow, and she can have her cursed position.  I would've loved to take her assignment, and have JUST 4 people to take care of, cause then I could actually make sure that EVERYTHING was done properly, and not just "I think" it's done properly.

I can't wait until tomorrow at 3:15pm when I can walk out those side doors at work and say SEE YA!  I mean, really...seriously....I'm gone!  At least tomorrow I'll have that extra 20 minutes that I won't be stuck in the back room supervising breakfast.  20 minutes is an other person out of bed!  If I can get to that tomorrow, I'll be set for the day!  I don't even remember what it's like not having to be all rushed rushed, and actually having time to be able to help my co-workers.  The prospect of it is awesome!  (watch tomorrow be the biggest pain in the butt day)

Anywho....on a COMPLETELY different note...

Saturday is BIG grocery shopping day.  Like, 2 shopping carts kinda grocery shopping.  (oh wait, I live in the south....they call them buggies! ha ha)  Gonna stock up a little bit on some food storage.  Found out the family likes Aldi's instant mashed potatoes.  They only use water, so in an emergency situation, they would be easier to make than other instant potatoes that require water, milk, and butter to make.  Also, their green beans are ok.  Corn is-eh.  I'm a little unimpressed with their corn.  Tastes to me like field corn, but how on earth would I know what field corn tastes like?  Well, that's an other story.


;-)



oh yeah, and the bitch pills worked....crap-well, sorta crap