Family Ties

Does anyone remember that show?  When Alex Keaton was in Kindergarten, he had green mittens that had money signs on the palms.  Skippy had green mittens too, (just with no money signs) that's how they became friends.  Why do I remember that?  Why do I remember any kind of useless crap like that?  My mind sometimes is a non-filter memory machine--but when it comes to me remembering the important things, sometimes I'm a little lax.  Just a little.  But seriously, talking about long term things, I can remember a LOT of stuff.  It's just that short term brain thing I need to work on.

So, family.  How do you define yours?  What is your family?  Today I had to draw on the love I have for my family to stay with my job.  I told my mom about the day I had (because my husband doesn't usually like to hear about the grossness at work), and I felt a teeny bit better.  My husband asked me to tell him about my day, because he knew I had a REALLY bad day.  After telling him, I looked back and I can't believe I let so much ruin my day.

Today was one of those days everything got to me.  EVERYTHING.  I even said to myself:  "If my family didn't need me to keep this job, I would walk out, even though I would lose my license."  I don't like being taken advantage of, I don't really think anyone does, but today it seemed that I was, not belittled, but berated maybe because I am a caring/thourough person in my care as an aide. 

The ADON (that would be assistant director of nursing) called me in to have me ask her what is wrong with a patient.   When I mentioned something she said "Oh, I didn't even see that, what else is wrong here."  Finally I gave in and said "What?!?  What is wrong?"  It did set the tone for the whole day, but really; I'm a DAMN good CNA, and I'm seriously thinking about taking my "compassion" skills somewhere else.  I give good care, I just don't have enough time to give the highest quality of care I can with the current patient load.  I have to do "run throughs" on some people.  I have a resident who actually asked me one time to "run her through the car wash"; meaning she wanted a quick shower.  But, as I sit here I think-how did she come up with that analogy?  Did she think it up?  Did an other aide say that to her?  I don't know, but it's got me thinking.

So, back to family.  My family is the CORE of everything I do.  Whenever I have a thought, I think about how it'll affect my family life.  I don't much go out, because I'll miss out on my family time.  My kids are not going to be home the rest of the life (Despite Zsusanna's adament remarks.)  I have to be here to enjoy them.  I have to be here to encourage them.  I have to be here, to be their mother.  I can go out after they are moved away, or even in college.  (once again, Zsusanna is insistant she is only going to stay in the dorms for freshman year)  Today it just reaffirmed to me that I love my family, and how near and dear they are to me.  So much so, that I would deal with my crappy day and not let it get me to quit.

I came home and warned the children.  "Mommy had a bay day, let me calm down."  Too bad the dog doesn't understand American English!  I was trying to relax in my room, when I stood up to come into the living room, the dog jumped up and knocked the glass of pop in my hand, spilling it on my comforter.  I tried to knock if off/clean it up, before it sunk it, but it was too late.  The splatter reached farther than I had originally thought.

It's alright....
It's ok....

Because this is what makes life all worthwhile:



Thank goodness their room doesn't look like that any more, or I may come home and wanna pull my hair out too!


So, just to give a little shout out to my family here.  I love you guys and you all make my days worth it.  With out you, I would truely be nothing.