However, there are things that are weighing heavy on my heart lately.
1. Recently my sister has come into some...well, we'll just say domestic issues. My husband and I offered her a way out, and a place to stay while the 'issue' was resolved. She has accepted twice, and turned us down 3 times. :( She is an adult, she can make her own decisions, but I hope for the sake of her son she makes the right one.
2. My mom's dog passed away this past weekend. She had to be rushed in for emergency surgery, and when they opened her up, she was full of tumors. My mom had to make the very difficult decision to just have her put down while she was still on the operating table. This is extra hard for us, because we lost our family dog almost the same exact way.
3. Telling my patients/residents that I have accepted a position at a different facility.
4. Telling my sister that I can't afford to bring her down for 3 weeks while her son is at his fathers house for Christmas.
5. Being the big sister.
All of these things RIGHT NOW going on break my heart.
I told my husband this morning that I don't wanna be the big sister any more. I don't want to fix anything any more.
Just for today.
This by no means is a statement of uncaring. I care a lot. I care way too much-is that possible? I care a lot for these people in my life who are driving me cra....OMGosh, the laptop is now dis-functioning. I can't finish that word, because the button for the letter that comes next in that word isn't working.
This week I have a mini-vacation from my soon to be old place of employment. Yup! I've accepted employment elsewhere. I'm not publicly announcing my disembarking because I want it to be final (sorry, can't write the word that I really want, because of that darn button!) and concrete before I make it "Facebook official". Any-who, back to what I was getting at...I have so much to do this week before my vacation is over. College stuff to get situated; for both me and my oldest, grocery shopping, asking the bank why my daughters "free" checking account was charged $15, calling about my student loans, getting everyone in to the dentist before we lose our insurance, calling other employment recruiters to rescind my application for employment. I think Thursday I will...oh, wait, nope. I have a pre-employment appointment at my new employer. I will probably get a break next week when I have the equivalent of a long weekend off before I begin orientation on December 15.
OH! #6...the conflict at seminary...the ongoing conflict. People trying to butt heads and the huge pissing war. I thought we were adults? I seriously thought we were adults trying to teach the children, and not a bunch of selfish people. We are suppose to be creating spiritual wellness for our children, not petty choose sides crap.
As I sit here, I could probably think of more and more stuff to fill the "what breaks my heart" list. today it just seems is a very break my heart kind of day.
So, with that muddled mess, and my heart feeling even more heavy today than normal, and what I thought would be cathartic, getting it off my chest, is clearly not. So, I'll be going about my day. Planning my trip so I can hit everything in one swoop around the city. Ending of course with grocery shopping, don't wanna run errands in Florida with groceries in the car. Sometimes, I miss being able to put my pop out in the snow rather than the fridge. Snow is the perfect temperature for pop. Seriously!
Oh, yeah, and on a completely different note, completely away from any kind of thought I've had here today...How the HECK did Fargo get nominated for any kind of award? I understand how the female lead may have won something, but that's it. I was so disappointed in this movie. Holy Cow...for real people? I mean, even for 1996 they could've done better, and with those high level of actors? SERIOUSLY? I found nothing about that movie entertaining. NOTHING.
so, on that note.
Honey, 403. :D
